I wish that my first post to this forum in this, a new series of Tales of Adventure, could be more uplifting, more exciting, more packed with the adventure that you, the discerning fifteen-year olds with no credit card and forty-year olds in a dark basement who together constitute the player-base of Ultima Online, demand. Alas, this is sad tale of neglect, maltreatment, and, yes, even death. Not only death, but intentionally and cruelly inflicted death on Ultima Online's third noblest creature, the nightmare. It had come to my attention since my arrival a couple of weeks ago that many players on this shard maltreat their animals, animals to whom they are allegedly bonded. Not a day has gone by that I haven't seen nightmare after nightmare left in the street to fend for itself, or what's worse, nightmares holding up their masters who stand for hours, even days, at a time in the same place doing nothing. I thought to myself, "chumbucket, if being a bard means anything, it means helping the oppressed, making right what is wrong, and upholding the highest standards of moral excellence. I will save these animals. I will make a difference." And so it was that I spotted three abandoned (yet bonded) nightmares left at Occlo bank. (Occlo bank, I might add, is a refuge for the worst that Ultima Online has to offer. So many people standing, staring, doing nothing.) That is why I called in my associate snapdragon, aka Matron de Winter, aka Bigoud of the guild $$$ to provide assistance. A non-Associate, Buster Blackeye, rendered assistance as well. No doubt he too has a soft spot for the suffering of animals. Yet no sooner than we had escorted these poor animals to a safe area outside the city, local law enforcement arrived to menacingly observe our activities. He (or she) had no legal authority in animal affairs nor probable cause and so left. Our plan proceeded down the coast, to ships and freedom for these abused animals. But before we could get going, I had to find my llama PAWPAW. He was the finest llama ever to walk this Sosaria, and he was my companion for at least two whole days. A fine beast, I refused to leave without him. Onward we went, but nightmares are unruly beasts and passersby are as cruel as the owners. I soon was dead the first of about four-hundred times. But help arrived in the form of additional Associates. We arrived with all three mares in tow to the HMS Bard, the ship that would take them beyond Occlo to freedom and a life of dignity. I would like to tell you that we saved these animals, that we brought them to a golden land of green grasses where they to this day graze to with nary a (UhOh) member in sight to abuse them physically and emotionally. I would like to tell you that, but, as a bard, I cannot lie. These beautiful animals were slaughtered from afar by their owner. We watched them drop dead before our very eyes, as a mysterious figure named Scooter appeared. (I have my suspicions that this "Scooter," despite his YOUNG tag was the real villain of this story and was in fact responsible for the maltreatment and death of these beautiful animals.) (Scooter appears at just the "right" time. A trick he pulled later as we investigated some nearby caverns. Here I offer him all eight of the gold in my backpack in hopes he will not slaughter the last one.) While investigating the aforementioned caverns, we found several "Fluffy V" dragons. They were angry at the rampant abuse of animals in these lands but took it out on us. Unfortunately, our beloved PAWPAW the llama was lost in action. (Not pictured, as I still can't bear the grief.) On my return to Occlo, I found one Nefarious, a well-known abuser of animals, continually mounting and dismounting another nightmare. I took it on myself to lead the nightmare to freedom only to be waylaid by orcs. They are as savage as Nefarious, and soon the nightmare had died. This story has no happy ending. All the mares died. Three at the hands of the very owner. (Damn you, Scooter!) The final nightmare's owner did not kill it, though many nights I am sure it wished that it were dead. Orcs instead took its life. Ruminating on these events for the past several hours while walking the Occlo streets crowded with motionless men and women in trance-like states, I have come to some important resolutions. I cannot stand idly by as animals are abused. I cannot stand by while the streets are overran with these motionless zombies. I vow here and now that I will use all my powers and all my efforts in eradicating animal abuse and emptying the street of these motionless husks. And I vow that I will take the ill-gotten and ill-used goods of any such players and put them towards further ends worthy of my calling as a bard. This is swear to you! So take notice, UOR, I am coming for your afk-ers and your unattended mares. No evil-doer is safe.
Yay I'm in a ToA. ^That's me fishing. Shame I was thinking so much about all my lovely fishsteaks I didn't even notice the good people working around me.
PAWPAW served you well chumbucket. A loyal mount till the end. Gave his life for the cause of freeing abused animals.....a moment of silence.....for this hero! Do not let this tragedy sway you from your righteous and noble path my friend.
chumbucket I think this Sunday i will hold a vigil for PAWPAW, not only for him and his selfless service, but also to shed light on this most grievous of crimes know as animal neglect! maybe
My llama 'Purdy' also fell to fluffy because of me accidentally hitting my recall macro key rather than my hide hotkey next to it sadness. A sacrifice for a worthy cause though, I suppose! Honored to be of service to the animals. edit: Oh actually one of the pictures above captures the exact second it happened! RIP Pawpaw + Buster + Purdy
Thank you, Taste, for keeping the memory of PAWPAW alive. I regret that i was unable to attend, but I did see all the PAWPAW llamas running loose in Occlo afterwards. It brought tears to my eyes.
The correct answer is (in reverse order for dramatic effect): 10. Ettin 9. Stone Harpy 8. Cat 7. Hellcat 6. Weak Mongbat 5. Imp 4. Ophdian Justicar 3. Nightmare, but only if free of abuse. 2. Strong Mongbat. 1. Llama
Never forget. Thanks to Taste for the memorial for PAWPAW (that I couldn't make it to) and the wonderful book along with all the signatories.
