Quest for the best: Jupiter vs Balrog! 1on1! Who wins?

@Jupiter, the famous Grey wizard! It is time to proof your mastery of the arcane arts. Well, or your wits.

In reminiscence of the other bearded weed-smoking father-type wizard that sends people to their doom in disputable quests, I challenge you to battle a Balro(g)n!!! No other fools are allowed to help you! They all fled already! Just you old man and your shepherds crook cane.



The reward for this feat is a hell of a lot XP points that don't need to be shared with anybody. You might even level up and get this following bonus reward:

A lifetime supply of spare canes, clean white clothes, a cloth insurance, and a fireworks wand for crazy hobbit parties to impress the little children.



Just a hint for your quest: No re-skilling is needed and even allowed. You don't need barding, or taming or whatever. Your magical skills are more than sufficient. In fact, if you go the real tricky way, a fresh born player without any skills can kill them (with the proper requisites and enough time). So, items are allowed, but not necessary. Hiding isn't needed, but might help when trying certain tactics. Proof shot (took me ~10-15 minutes in my first try):



Farewell, old man and watch the bottomless pit that opened before you!



Oh, and don't forget some proof shots!

100 gold on the Balron

Oh boy... @Jupiter is foolish enough to accept this....

literally. just. on the ground. belting out laughter.




IT'S SO TRUE ALL OF IT

Let's make it interesting.... I've got a gold brick (not the kind you mine.....the kind that spawns in Occlo) on the Wizard.


*elbows Jupiter*

Hope you know what you're doing, ol' Rogue.

"A deadly sword, a healing hand,
a back that bent beneath its load;
a trumpet-voice, a burning brand,
a weary pilgrim on the road.

A lord of wisdom throned he sat,
swift in anger, quick to laugh;
an old man in a battered hat
who leaned upon a thorny staff.

He stood upon the bridge alone
and Fire and Shadow both defied;
his staff was broken on the stone,
in Khazad-dûm his wisdom died."

How to slay a balrog,
tis an easy task,
for a drake or dragon,
but for a old man,
beckoned by adventure


First, to complete this quest, I quickly realized I could not merely go a slay a balrog. Strictly speaking to mechanics, the task is quite simple:
Step 1 Find a Balrog
Step 2 Use powerful spells to inflict damage
Step 3 Don't die.

But just slaying a Balrog would not suffice, for to answer this call with sufficient pomp and pinache, Jupiter realized he must first organize a company of 9 and lead them on a quest!

**********************************************************************************************************************************************************

A quest to destroy a ring of ultimate power would suffice, and with the company organized they plunged deep into the depths of the darkest caverns in search of a suitable bridge upon which to make a grandiose last stand.




After demolishing the bridge and falling to the bottomless pit, Jupiter pursued the Balrog (or rather was pursued) and the battle raged up the endless stair case





Atop Durin's Tower, Jupiter smote the Balrog, who smashed into the tower and was defeated at last!







Bloopers

This story has been added to the oral history of Paws.

MEMORIZED!​

UO:R will never be the same now that the old grey wizard has suddenly become the mighty Jupiter the White, slayer of The Slayer

Well done and gratulation! I am most impressed by your recreation of the lotr experience. You definitely earned a UO:R special oscar for best screnplay (hint hint @Chris)!

Mysterious winds have transported the well earned reward to Jupiters stronghold. May his fame shine bright and ice white!

I freakin love this game.

And the crazy mofo's that play it!!

*blows dust off extended version Fellowship of the Ring*

Goodbye productive Saturday.....

At least I'm not the only one!!

De Uruk'Hai gunna wyn! Uu reed it wrung lazy tyme!

Agh GUG skribblez panzee grey mojo humie.

Does this mean we can get Jupiter an ice white outfit??

You do that and next thing you know he'll summon some totally OP ability like.. I dunno, ha-ha like some kinda flying bird (lol) and totally ruin the story.
Then out of the blue dwarves start dating elves and ... yeah, better just keep it grey.

oh no, we aren't turning back now!

But he mus, he mus!!

I assume he's gone into hiding for his big transformation into the white.