After a solo run into Shame, I was inspired. Should have taken more screenshots. Future volumes will be more illustrated. I call this piece "NOODLE THE HORSE IS AN IDIOT". Enjoy. <singing> Delving in a dungeon, Deep as I can be. Killing, maiming, looting All the corpses I can see. Come around the corner and What do I find there? About a MILLION freaking elementals, And all of them are AIR. LIGHTNING BOLT POISON LIGHTNING BOLT POISON LIGHTNING BOLT LIGHTNING BOLT LIGHTNING BOLT DEAD Now I'm staring at my body. This is kind of crappy. All my loot just laying there, No reason to be happy. Healer standing just outside. He patches me right up. Stupid horse didn't follow And now I've got to run. Find a bank and re-equip. I'm going right back in. At least I have to get my sword And find my tambourine. Going to be careful now. Don't want to die again. I sneak right past the earthies And the giant scorpions. Down a level, cross the bridge. The coast is looking clear. I can see my body And those things that I hold dear. I grab it all and hoof it out As fast as I can run. Coming back and grabbing it Sure was lots of fun. OH NO! The bridge is blocked! I'll never make it through! The million Airs Are waiting there. In my pants I make a poo. LIGHTNING BOLT POISON LIGHTNING BOLT POISON LIGHTNING BOLT LIGHTNING BOLT LIGHTNING BOLT DEAD AGAIN FOR THE LOVE OF ... Boo! A ghost! But not me! It's my horse! Noodle, you idiot! Why'd you stay in place? I was walking everywhere. Could have used your faster pace. Now we're walking back to Yew You'd best be keeping up. Turn around go back again Since you keep on getting stuck. A long walk to the abbey And I'm finally me again. Now let's see if we can find A veterinarian. Need a bank to get some cash And then we're out the door. Heading for the moongate And you've disappeared once more. You stupid horse! Where did you go? I was going to get you help. If you got stuck on a bush again, I'll rez you to kill you myself. The hunt begins! Where is the moron hiding? <singing stops> Wait, no. No. How does he hide? He's a horse! Horses can't hide! Seriously, where are you? Damn horse. Guess I'm retracing my steps back to the bank. Dude, for real. Where. Did. You. Go? And now I'm tracing my steps back again. Discovery! Elation! Wait... HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET ON THE ROOF? Oh, that's great! Of course the door is locked. And unlike you, I'm not dead, so you're stuck. Forever. You know what? It's fine. Stay up there, horse. Haunt that tower forever. Because it's funny. Horse ghost haunting a tower. Hilarious. Me? I'm going to the moongate, and then the stables in Skara Brae where I'm going to get a horse that isn't an idiot. You do you. Neighboo or whatever. I'm out. Stupid horse. Seriously? I walk away from the tower and you're just going to walk right out? I hate you so much, horse. It's good to have you back. FIN
Bravissimo! Enjoyed this thoroughly. Mostly because I can relate. Well done sir! Look forward to more.
