Recently, several members of the Knights of Sosaria were sent to investigate reports of "a foul stench wafting from a residence." As protectors of the realm, the Knights of Sosaria also do service as heading up Lord British's HOA and the Public Health and Sanitation Department. We went to investigate and were soon lead to the dreaded stench by the rancid odor on the winds. Ducky was quoted as saying, "I live on a river and even I could not stand the stench of the fish." Rotting refuse was seen piled to the ceilings. It looked as if a band of merry hobo's had been squatting in the home and relieving themselves on the premises. Not to mention, their sense of interior decorating skills did not live up to Lord British's HOA Standards. A certain level of decor is required under law in Lord British's KoS lands and only the fashionably sensible and skillful interior decorators have been approved for use by Lord British's HOA. As far as their Health and Sanitation standards...they were non-existent. Needless to say, RRG's Violations were numerous... Public Health and Sanitation: Numerous Communicable Diseases RRG Members observed not washing hands after relieving themselves Improper storage of raw fish Food in poor condition Surfaces not cleaned/sanitized No Water No Bathrooms Rodents/Roaches/Vermin Lord British's HOA: Not propertly storing refuse Violated proper and accepted landscape maintenance rules Improperly hobbled horses Step tread height and depth not up to code Violations of public health and safety Too many citizens dwelling in residence in violation of public safety code Illegal accumulation of abandoned property and debris Not registered for your community's HOA HOA dues outstanding No building permit obtained prior to construction Prohibited signage General lack of upkeep The Evidence: Artist's Crime Scene Sketch #238 The Evidence: Artist's Crime Scene Sketch #458 The Evidence: Artist's Crime Scene Sketch #657 The Evidence: Artist's Crime Scene Sketch #758 A meeting was assembled to discuss how to handle such filthy members of society that clearly do NOT follow the laws of Lord British's HOA...let alone common standards of health and sanitation. The rulings from the meeting were as follows: All RRG members must pay a 10,000gp fine. All violations must be immediately addressed and fixed. The premises must be immediately demolished and and the site burned to cleanse the filth. Proper building permits must be applied for, paid for, and posted. Past and outstanding HOA fees must be paid plus interest. These total 237,567gp. HOA fees in the future are 100,000gp and shall be paid on the first new moon. Until all fees and issues are addressed, all RRG members are to be considered criminals under Lord British's laws and will be arrested on sight. Any RRG member's found to be resisting arrest will be dealt with severely. We urge all RRG members to do the right thing and correct their transgressions against Lord British and the realm of Sosaria. All fines and fees will be collected by Lightshade. ~ L / S
I like this natural rivalry. I hope it continues in the spirit of rivalry and does not sour anyone. I haven't been in game in a while and I would be most interested in encountering these self proclaimed tax collectors.
When I return from my "trip abroad" at the end of the month, we'll take care of these imposters. It is not surprising that such cowardly murderers and thieves would attack when I am off visiting distant lands for the month. In the meantime I encourage all good citizens of Sosaria to bring this fight to their doorstep.
I lament to see my fellow business associates having to deal with such medieval ruffians. I came across one of these RRG members just the other day and he promptly ran away. Unfortunately, the stench from his meager bathing habits did not go with him. The rancid stink permeated the air long after he left. Though, I suppose he may have soiled himself as he ran away, also. I suppose I should give him the benefit of the doubt! My business associates and I shall be looking into this RRG's underhanded dealings. Violating Lord British's laws is serious business and Radical Larry is not amused.
These are rather odd pretend tax collectors. I hardly ever see them and they seem to attack new members in the newbie dungeon...which hardly seems to even keep up with their chirade. It seems like they only impersonate tax collectors while I'm sleeping or visiting distant lands. Otherwise, they're always quite quick to be off to other things when I encounter them. That's rather.....odd.
Please sir Radical Larry don't hurt me. You look mean out of the bunch. Actually I'd sh*t my pants with that lot walking towards me...
